Blogging is fun and I still have many ideas, but as you can tell, I don’t post them very often anymore. I don’t have any real reason why this is. Well, maybe I have three reasons. Blogging takes time, most of what I say when I do blog is pretty stupid, and I’m an old man who probably shouldn’t be sitting here typing stupid stuff all the time. On the other hand, I am probably one of the most hip men on the planet and everything that I say is incredibly insightful, as well as extremely hilarious.

So that leaves me with the question of what I should do with this website.

As the first anniversary of gravy approaches, I’d like to think that I’ll continue to keep it going. I will try my best to do so. When I started this thing I really enjoyed posting my thoughts, but as time went on, I sort of lost that interest. Like I said before, I always have ideas, but actually sitting down and doing it doesn’t happen much anymore. I may get back into it as it gets colder. I may be a quitter. We’ll see.

In my opinion, the best blogger out there is a dude named Dave Lozo. He is sort of a prick, but he is a solid writer and his blog is hilarious. He touches on bloggers being quitters here.

All of that being said…

The Browns suck and Kenny Rogers cheats. All pitchers cheat to some degree, but Kenny is the only one stupid enough to smear a huge glob of pine tar on his hand while pitching in the WS with the best cameras in the world zooming in on him and broadcasting his image across the globe. It was just dirt. Nice job Kenny.

Bummin’ was here on and off for several weeks. He didn’t have a ‘stache while he was here, but he sure had one in Alaska this summer. He just left for Poland yesterday. See you in six months Bubs…

Your government is still out of control. Here is one tiny example.

The Pal-Mac dude commenting under the name “hello� among others, is a large douche. Please go back to killing cats on Prospect.

Big D Burnett is healing the world with coolness.

It is time for Taco Tuesday and baseball.

That’s all I’ve got for now.

Catch you soon,
Graham

Hello gravy people. I’m still here. Sorry for the slacking. Here are some good pics from a good parade.

I’m getting back into the routine, so I should be checking in regularly soon. I hope you had a happy Poogle Day. Catch you soon.

Later,
Graham

The L29 bus trip to the casino was a sweet time. We even brought our “special” relative Ham along for the ride. As you can see he had a great time too. Look how happy he gets when we let him take his helmet off! Early highlights of the day included a high resolution/surround sound screening of the 40 Year Old Virgin on the bus, and me winning some $ on the slot machines (which NEVER happens to me.) After I won, we walked over to a local bar where Mrs. Gravy whooped my ass in darts. There was a very loud and annoying woman in the bar (in addition to Mrs. Gravy,) who was driving us absolutely nuts, so we headed back to the casino. When we returned, Mrs. Gravy went to the buffet and I went to the bar/Keno lounge where I watched the Yankees and won some more cash on Keno. Before we knew it, it was time to go back to the big P. We boarded the bus, and headed back to the Lock for some pizza. What a great day. I would highly recommend going next year. We’ll be there.

Check here for a few pics. We didn’t get a chance to take very many, but there are a few good ones there. I tried to get a couple of Ham slamming beers on the ride home, but he was drinking them too fast for the camera to capture.

Catch you later,
Graham

I just heard one of my old favorites on Sirius 17. Great station and a great band. I miss Phish. Ms. Fish? Deffany. Remember this one?

My mind’s got a mind of its own
It takes me out a walkin’ when I’d rather stay at home
Takes me out to parties when I’d rather be alone
My mind’s got a mind of its own

I tell myself to do the things I should
And then I get to thinkin’ that them things ain’t any good.
I tell myself the truth but know I’m lying like a snake
You can’t walk on water at the bottom of a lake.

Good song. Summer doesn’t seem to be conducive to blogging for me. Too much going on every day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m having one of the best summers ever and enjoying every day to the fullest, but I’m ready to get back into the work routine. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever said that.

Anyway, I’ll be back soon with some fresh gravy. Until then, watch out for them sturgeon at the bottom of the lake. Or jumping sturgeon. Check out this dude.

I just reread what I wrote above. What a strange post. I should try to limit my drunken blogging…hahahaha…

Later,
Graham

I’ve been having lots of good times. Summer is the best. That’s why we’re here. Good times, right? Deffany.

Thanks to all the friends who came out to the gravy residence last night. Fun stuff.

Lots of pics from our trip to Jamie’s wedding can be seen here.

On the aforementioned trip I became acquainted with some Long Island cock. See him up there? They sure have great flapping cocks on Long Island.

Tomorrow is our 5th anniversary. Here’s to many more.

Quiquiriquí,

Graham

That sure was a long break between posts. I’ve been enjoying the summer to the fullest. Here is a bit of an update…

We are making good progress with the home improvement plans. The inside of the pad is looking sweet. The outside still looks like we’re scumbags though. That’s OK – it’ll keep the taxes down. Are small trees supposed to grow out of gutters?

The Lock 29 Golf Tourney was a great time. I even hit several good shots. I’d like to do some more golfing. I bet I could be a decent golfer if I golfed more than once every couple of years.

Bob’s bachelor party is planned for Saturday 8/26. Everyone is invited. If you’re interested in attending, send me an email and I’ll give you all of the details. If not, you probably hate Bob.

The second season of The Contender starts tonight. I loved the first one. Looking forward to this one.

Howard’s girlfriend is a big horseface. I’m sick of hearing everyone say how hot she is. I mean, she’s deffany good looking and has a great body, but the way people talk about her on the show, you’d think she was the hottest woman on the planet. She’s not.

We’re going to Long Island this Thursday – Sunday for a wedding.

Rodney is fat again. Check that link as well as the other updates to my flickr page and you’ll see what I mean. His blood sugar is regulated now, but he still eats like a pig. He weighed in at 220 yesterday. He’ll be 300 within a year.

Speaking of fat, the Yankees signed Sidney Ponson and he’s starting tonight. He is a career bum with horrible numbers. He will not be successful in NY. I hope he is, but I guarantee he’ll be released after a couple of starts. Good luck Sid. Prove me wrong.

In final fat news, I’d love to shave off my stupid goatee, but my face is fat and I have a double chin. I’d look a lot like that guy up there if I shaved it off. Damn.

I don’t hate A-Rod, but I have no love for him. I wish another team could afford his ridiculous contract. I’d love to see him traded for some pitching. Maybe I don’t wish that. Again, like every other Yankee, I’m pulling for him. His numbers are good, but not what has come to be expected of him. Please play better A-Rod.

I was checking the early NFL odds, and right now the Browns are anywhere from 50/1 to 100/1 to win the Super Bowl. I’m throwing down $20 with my bookie. I’ll see y’all February 4, 2007 with a Browns victory and 2 grand in my pocket. Beers on me.

Finally, a quick rant. Don’t be offended Sweens. I cannot freaking stand that Taylor Hicks Ford commercial. I don’t watch much TV other than the Yankee games, but I swear they play that stupid commercial 25 times during any given game on YES. Go ahead. Count tonight. Anyway, I turn the channel as soon as I can every time it starts, but the thing is, the commercial starts immediately with a close-up of his stupid gray head and he is belting out “I get I want…� within a half of a second. By the time I can react and turn the channel, he’s halfway through his little gay dance. Drives me so nuts. F Taylor Hicks.

That’s all. Bye for now.

Possibilities,
Graham

I just called Rod using a Howard Stern soundboard that I found online. Click the link below to listen to the call. If you see or talk to Rod in the upcoming days, please don’t mention it to him. I plan on making a few more soon. Enjoy!

Howard Calls Rodney

Update:
9:05 pm
Rod just called me again. I told him that Howard was still here and I couldn’t get rid of him.

Howard Calls Rodney II

Rod is the greatest guy there is. He stuck up for me and tried to get rid of “Howard” for me.

Rod rules…

The Yankees Entertainment and Sports Network announced today that they have hired Kimberly Jones’ twin sister Corky Jones as a second on-site reporter. Corky’s responsibilities will include asking Joe Torre stupid questions, hitting on A-Rod, shaving Kim’s chin and eating fish sammaches.

Welcome aboard Corky.

Just this week two great guys that I knew died way before they should have. It has really had an impact on me. Introspective shit going on in my head, you know? We should all take the time to enjoy those close to us while we can. It is such a cliché, but it is so true. Any of us could be goners tomorrow.

RIP Bill

RIP Mike

Truly,
Graham

The Yankees just lost on a walk-off HR that some Washington scrub hit. Wang’s brilliant day ruined. Now I’m uptight and ready to vent. Nobody is gong to care about this, but I do. Plus, I haven’t had a nice, angry rant on here for quite some time. I was listening to the Yankees on the radio yesterday…

Yankee radio broadcasts are unlistenable. I watch every Yankee game, but occasionally I have to drive somewhere during a game so I listen on the radio. I cannot stand Suzyn Waldman, and John Sterling is just as bad.

Suzyn is the old, annoying broad who used to be the on-site reporter for the YES Network. Fortunately, Kimberly Jones has that job now and we don’t have to look at Suzyn any more. Unfortunately, Suzyn took over for Charlie Steiner on the radio last year.

Anyway, her voice and accent drive me absolutely bonkers.

“Here in the baaawwwwwtom of the 5th, the Yankees lead 2-1.”
“Now in the taaaawwwwwp of the 7th…”
“Derek Jeter staaaaawwwwwwped just before he hit the wall.”

She’s from Boston, and was a Red Sox fan originally. She probably still is. And she constantly says stupid shit. She needs to be fired immediately.

Then you have John Sterling. He’s the prick who hosts Yankeeography. The deep-voiced stiff with the stupid catch-phrases such as “Bernie goes boom,” “An A-Bomb from A-rod,” “Jorgie juiced one,” and countless other ridiculous sayings.

The catch-phrases are bad enough, but the thing that bothers me the most about him is his snooty, bitchy little remarks he makes every time the Yankees are on national TV. You see, if the Yankees are on Fox (as they were yesterday,) the time between innings is slightly extended for advertising purposes. I have no problem with that because these networks pay HUGE money to get the rights to broadcast the games. Baseball is business. A couple of years ago I remember hearing Sterling say something like, “The extended time between innings is just unbearable.” and “Thanks to the TV network, oh, this time between innings is just horrible.” Those aren’t exact quotes, but the dude bitches like 10 times per game about this for at least the past 3 years. Probably even longer. Yesterday included. Every single time they are on Fox, I have to listen to this prick bitch about an extra minute or 2 between innings. Shut up John.

Did you ever think that maybe the Yankees pay for your no-talent ass with some of that money they get from Fox? I’ve never once heard him bitch about his inflated pay check. Shut up John.

So that’s it. John Sterling and Suzyn Waldman blow. They have completely ruined Yankee radio broadcasts.

Sincerely,
Tom Seaver, Bill White and Scooter

Today’s thoughts…

I really enjoy feeding birds. I get many customers at my birdfeeders, but I can’t always identify them. Maybe that will be a project of mine this summer. Becoming familiar with the types of birds that come to my house to eat.

I’ve been adding new pics to my flickr page. Check them out.

My buddy Heavy D gets out of the slammer on Friday. Good for him. Welcome back Heavy D.

George Takei has been the guest announcer on Howard all week. Hilarious.

Mrs. Gravy is making what she calls “Crazy Lasagna� right now. She made it about 10 years ago for me and it really wasn’t that great. It has been sort of a running joke ever since. Tonight is Crazy Lasagna Part II. A decade removed. I bet it will be delicious. Perhaps even crazy.

Speaking of crazy, while in NC, I got into the original Star Trek and watched pretty much every episode. It is actually really good stuff. Do you remember the one when Sulu got all mean and crazy? That was deffany a good one.

Big B Driscoll got a sweet new guitar. I can’t wait to hear it. I may even ask him if I can strum it once. His guitar. He and Willie are recording an album and they asked me to come and add to it. I’m deffany honored.

I watched Neil’s Heart of Gold DVD yesterday. Pretty good stuff. He does an incredible Old Laughing Lady all by himself in the empty theatre at the end. That was my favorite part. I still haven’t seen the extras on disc 2, but I know I’ll dig that as well.

Time for the Yankees. And Crazy Lasagna.

O-Qua Tangin Wann,
Graham Gravy Audubon